DOCintheBiz

Difficulties of Finding a Medication that Works for You

Questions and Answers from DOCintheBiz

Question: I am having a very difficult time dealing with this horrible depression that has taken over my life. I know I need to be on a medication to help with this, but I am terrified to even think about having to deal with medications and side effects, etc. Please, can you help, Dr KC?

Answer: I am so sorry to hear of your difficultly dealing with your feelings and also the fears associated with the possibility of beginning a new medication. Have you a psychiatrist with whom you are working? If so, that is wonderful and you can share your fears/concerns with him/her. Also, I would highly suggest pairing a therapist with the psychiatrist to deal with the underlying reasons for your “depression”. I do not know enough to be able to speak to this if we do not talk one on one, so I hope you are going to get the help you need either here or somewhere else where you feel comfortable.

When writing about any psychotropic medication or ANY medication for that matter, medical professionals have to be very careful about using disclaimers.

All people are unique and different and all people have different body/brain chemistry. This is why one medication will work wonders on one person, but not work at all on another. Finding the right medication often takes time and much patience as many people wait to get over side effects that often even turn a person away from a certain medication. I see this happen more times than I would like, but I do understand. Some people may experience side effects so horrible that they cannot deal with them for one more minute, while others have no negative reactions whatsoever. Why is this so? This is a question that just cannot be answered and that is what makes this such a difficult process.

I have written a couple of articles discussing this subject in more detail at:

How do I Know what Medication is Best for my Mental/Emotional Disorder

I hope this will be found useful!

Thank you for so much for writing in to me and I hope it was helpful to some degree. Your concern could not have come at a better time as I have been approached by a few with this same issue in the last week. Please make sure to get help somewhere as YOU ARE WORTH IT!

All my best,

31 Year Old Virgin

admin — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 16:22:16 +0000

by KC Kelly, Ph.D., LMHC

Questions and Answers from DOCintheBiz

Question: Hey, I’m a 31 year old female and still a virgin. Do you think that would turn a guy off? I like someone but I’m nervous about his reaction.

I’m not really all that experienced. There aren’t any major reasons why I haven’t lost my virginity yet. I just haven’t met the right guy I want to be intimate with.

Answer: The most important thing to remember is that someone needs to like or love you for exactly the person you are. If someone doesn’t like you because of your hair color, weight, height, or because you are a virgin, than that is his choice.

You will gain your experience in all areas of your life, including your sexuality when you are ready and not a moment before. There is nothing to feel badly or ashamed of about that. Trust in yourself that you will know when the right time is to take that next step, as you will feel comfortable enough in yourself, in your relationship, and with the other person to “feel” it is right for you!

You need inner self love first…then you’ll find that confidence to know when is the right time not only for sexual intimacy, but also for so many other things in your life.

Please visit the self esteem section of my blog, where you will find several articles on how to feel good about yourself that I hope can prove helpful to you. Feel free to comment and you will always receive a response from me.

We can even “talk” one on one if you want about your particular issues at DOCintheBiz.

Best of luck to and please love yourself. You’re worth it!

Dr. KC
http://DOCintheBiz.com
http://GLCzone.com

Building Self Worth and Loving Yourself

admin — Sun, 31 Aug 2008 15:24:35 +0000

by KC Kelly, Ph.D., LMHC

Questions and Answers from DOCintheBiz

I would like to tell a true short story of inspiration about a client who suffers from low self esteem. I have gotten permission to repost an email exchange from myself and a 35 year old, recently divorced man who had forgotten his worth and purpose in life.

I have to admit that without a doubt, not only do our clients learn from us, but that we continually learn from them as well. This time the question was proposed by the therapist (me) and the client was the one who answered. (The very last question posted here was NOT sent to him, but it was what I was thinking.)

Question: You said you started to wear a wedding ring and you’re not married. Can you share your reasoning?

Answer: I know I’m not married, so it may seem silly to you that I am wearing a wedding ring. You know how badly I am looking for true love in my life to make me happy and fulfilled. I want to find a woman to love unconditionally through the good times and bad times. A woman with faults like everyone in the world has, who I love anyway. A woman to treat with kid gloves. A woman to show kindness, warmth, caring, and never-ending support to. A woman to understand and love as I look past all about her I may not agree with. A woman to honor, cherish, and take care of all the days of my life.

Well, I’ll tell you what. I am convinced that I have to love myself FIRST before I can love someone else. So, as for now…the person I want to be married to is myself.

I wear this ring to remind myself that I need to love myself, take care of myself, enjoy my own company, find things that make me happy, be kind to myself, pamper myself, and most importantly, know my worth, value and significance in this world. And thanks to you, I know the importance of loving myself, for I know that I want to share a happy life with someone wonderful and not be with them to save me or rescue me. I need to be whole and have a healthy relationship with myself first, so that I can give that person to the woman who is deserving of all I have to offer.

Question: How much do I owe YOU?

Accepting Compliments When You Have Low Self Esteem

admin — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 12:32:10 +0000

by KC Kelly, Ph.d., LMHC

Questions and Answers from DOCintheBiz

Question: I am always saying bad things about myself and not accepting compliments because I think it’s the same thing as fishing for compliments. What do you think this means?

Answer: When a person says bad things about themselves or cannot accept compliments, it’s usually a sign of low self esteem. Not in all cases, of course.

Being humble is one thing and a good thing, but one can usually tell the difference between someone who is humble and one who has low self esteem.

There are so many ways to overcome low self esteem and feel good about yourself. Once you feel comfortable in your own skin, believe in yourself and love yourself, you will see significant changes in your life.

Sometimes, seeking counseling or therapy is a great idea to get to know YOU better. Through the assistance of a therapist, self discovery can be a wonderful life changing gift you can give yourself.

Please visit the self esteem section of my blog here, where you will find several articles on how to feel good about yourself that I hope can prove helpful to you. Feel free to comment and you will always receive a response from me.

We can even “talk” one on one if you want about your particular issues at DOCintheBiz.

I wish you all the best,
Dr. KC
http://DOCintheBiz.com
http://GLCzone.com

My Girlfriend is Suicidal

admin — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 18:38:08 +0000

by KC Kelly, Ph.d., LMHC

DOCintheBiz is trying something new.
Welcome to my new QUESTIONS and ANSWERS forum.

I get emails daily asking me different questions about mental/emotional health related issues and I have decided to answer them here in my blog, hence, writing about topics that YOU want to read about. So, here we go!

Please continue sending in your questions to the contact support services link on the bottom of every page on the main site DOCintheBiz and I will do my very best to get to each and every question asked. Please have patience to see your question posted, as I have many and will only post once/week. Be well, stay strong, and keep on dreaming big! Dr. KC

Questions and Answers from DOCintheBiz

Question: My girlfriend tried to kill herself and she wants to try to do it again. I don’t know why because she won’t tell me, but I don’t know what to do. If she kills herself, I’m going to do something rash. I can’t live without her. I can only write this here online to you because if I told anyone else this, I don’t know what they would do. Please help.

Answer: Nothing and no one is worth ending your life over. I know this is difficult to hear, especially when you are going through such a hard time, but it is true.

If you are seriously thinking about killing yourself, you owe it FIRST to yourself to call a crisis line or 911 IMMEDIATELY!!

If your girlfriend has already tried to kill herself once and is talking about doing it again with a plan, it is your ethical duty to call 911 or an emergency hotline and get her the help she needs as well.

Here are some numbers for the both of you:

911
Or call the suicide hotline:
(800) 273-TALK
(800) 784-2433 (English) or (800) 784-2432 (Espanol)
Youth: (877) YOUTHLINE (968-8454)

As for you, you are doing the right thing, by at least reaching out for help here.

I invite you to please talk to someone in your local area about what you are going through. This is very serious.

You can also visit this link: DOCintheBiz, which will lead you to helpful links on suicidal ideation and hotline numbers. You can also find links to self esteem, depression, and relationships here in this blog. The many articles I have written on these topics may help you gain some great insight into what you are feeling. Feel free to ask questions and leave comments which I will always answer personally.

I even offer one on one services to talk confidentially with you at DOCintheBiz. However, if you are feeling suicidal at this time, please disconnect from the computer and call 911 or one of the hotline numbers above IMMEDIATELY!!

Please get the help you need and be kind and gentle to yourself! And know that you are never alone!

I wish you all the best,
Dr. KC
http://DOCintheBiz.com
http://GLCzone.com

Troubling Times and Priorities – What is Truly Important for TODAY?

admin — Sun, 03 Aug 2008 17:15:57 +0000

by KC Kelly, Ph.D., LMHC

What is Truly Important for Today? As an addendum to the previous article I wrote, Hope for a Bright Future During These Economically Hard Times, I write this article in an attempt to look at the whole suggestion of keeping hope, staying positive, and looking towards a brighter future in a different light. Instead of just staying up about a bright FUTURE, let’s take a look at what we have in the HERE and NOW and be thankful for that. Let’s realize what our priorities are or probably should be TODAY. If you’d like to do that, please continue reading.

These are indeed some hard times our country is going through; however, we’ve seen hard times before. In fact we have seen must worse times than what we are going through now, economically, and most of us came out alright. Most of us have been through a stock market crash and have lost everything. We’ve been through war and lost more. We’ve been through 911 and…well…you know what we lost. That gives me hope that we will all come out alright during this time of economic hardship. But let’s reframe this whole idea.

Perhaps if we look at our economic crisis as a “challenging” time instead of a “hard” time, we may gain a different perspective. Every challenge, obstacle, hurdle, or impediment that is put in front of us may be a test to find out what we truly want in life, what is truly important to us, and what our priorities truly are. If you follow my lead here, I am suggesting that we NEED to know what is truly important to us. What are our values? What are our priorities?

Are they the people in our lives who give us unconditional love and support, perhaps? Our inner strength, perhaps? Our good health, perhaps? Our ability to reach a place of peace within ourselves, perhaps? Everything else will come after that. If we can be strong internally for ourselves, we can be strong for others in our lives and all the situations that act as blockages to a great future. Life CAN be about the future, and realistically, it should be partly about planning intelligently for what is to come in life; however, let’s not take our eye off of today and what is important NOW.

Every challenging time should be viewed as a learning and growing experience brought to us to help us be more prepared for what’s to come “tomorrow,” not as a deterrent from our life’s plan or vision of what we truly want in life. Now, as you’ve been reading article after article that I have written, you know by now how positive I am of a GREAT tomorrow for all of us, but I couldn’t resist this quote. It’s a song by the wonderful Garth Brooks, “If Tomorrow Never Comes”…let’s make sure we enjoy today!

Thank you for reading and please, if you desire one on one help to get you through the hard times…or you need just a little push to hope…write to us here…at DOCintheBiz.

Hope for a Bright Future During These Economically Hard Times

admin — Sun, 27 Jul 2008 16:43:47 +0000

by KC Kelly, Ph.D., LMHC

We must always keep hope for a bright future even during these economically hard times that many of us are facing today!

I saw an article in USA Today (yes, believe it or not I read articles all day online AND off!). It talked about the great increase in the use of online therapy due to the financial stressors and hardships that people are facing today.

Who even wants to go out in their car anymore with these incredibly elevated gas prices? People are losing their jobs and health benefits left and right due to budget cuts across the country from so many large and small companies! And with no light in sight, it’s no wonder people are falling into chasms of depression, substance abuse, relationships issues including divorce, suicidal ideation, and the loss of self worth. It’s far from a joke. And it’s far from over.

This article I read, spoke of the increase in the use of therapy due to the aforementioned reasons. This brought to mind how the confidentiality, the convenience and especially now, the affordability of online therapy can truly be helpful. The need for therapy in general has increased according to my research because people now, more than ever need to talk to someone about how to deal with their financial crises and how they and their families are being affected. So many, who are losing their jobs and have no where to turn, cannot afford therapy after losing their health benefits, and often feel a sense of embarrassment to have the “need” for therapy to help them through. This goes hand in hand with the terrible stigma put on therapy today. Well, it’s still there, and online therapy is also there to help with the sting!

Are things going to get better? I can only guess they will (being the optimist I am), but of course, I cannot answer that question. How long will it take? I certainly cannot answer that one either. What I do know (and this is only one doctor’s opinion) is that everything happens for a reason and what we see happening to us today is only a building block for tomorrow. No matter how hard times seem, how stressful times are, how hopeless times feel, or how helpless WE may feel that things will turn around, the one thing we always have is the strength and resources within us to keep a positive attitude and to keep the hope that keeps us alive and always moving forward.

Here are few quotes to live by:

We judge of man’s wisdom by his hope. — Ralph Waldo Emerson

Practice hope. As hopefulness becomes a habit, you can achieve a permanently happy spirit. — Norman Vincent Peale

The very least you can do in your life is to figure out what you hope for. And the most you can do is live inside that hope. Not admire it from a distance but live right in it, under its roof. — Barbara Kingsolver

Thank you for reading and please, if you desire one on one help to get you through the hard times…or you need just a little push to hope…write to us here…at DOCintheBiz.

GLCzone.com- The Health Related Blogging Social Network is Back!

admin — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 15:49:32 +0000

by KC Kelly

GLCzone- The Health Related Blogging Social Network is Back!

I thought I would divert from the normal article writing practice to bring you some exciting news along with some shameless promotion!

I am excited to announce that GLCzone, A SOCIAL NETWORK PROMOTING TOTAL WELLNESS BLOGS FOR ALL is back up and running with a new look and design.

GLCzone plans on becoming the largest HEALTH related blog index on the Internet!

Whether you are looking to get traffic and promotion for your blog or you are looking for health related information, GLCzone is for you!

Let GLCzone guide you to a happy and healthier life! Start by visiting our blog directory to see the amazing blogs we have to offer! Register for free, make your own profile, submit your health related blog (if you have one), and be able to contact fellow bloggers directly. If you are already registered, your information has been waiting for you to come back and you will find your blog(s) featured on the front page!

Our social network of bloggers and blog readers offers something for everyone in total wellness! We always welcome help in supporting our site by donating or just visiting us often and watch us add new features as we grow! This is just the beginning!

Thanks all! You can let me know what you think too.

It’s all for you…my fellow bloggers and readers!

BLOGGERS: Promote your wellness blogs, connect with other health bloggers, and share your knowledge with the world!

VISITORS: Now there is ONE place online to get all your questions answered by expert bloggers, doctors, other professionals, & people just like you who share their expertise and personal experiences through blogging.

The Therapeutic Effects of Emotional Support Animals

admin — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 12:36:43 +0000

by KC Kelly, Ph.D., LMHC

The presence of an emotional support animal in one’s life can be an exceptional healing agent for mind/body/spirit infirmities as well as a catalyst for helping to promote wellbeing and quality of life.

The therapeutic effects that animals boast to assert over human suffering and help in healing have often proven to be astounding. This theory has been proven over and over again in medical studies conducted by researchers who bring together animals and those who reside in nursing homes plagued with dementia and/or Alzheimer’s disease, just as examples. Animals can also have positive effects on people without a disease or illness, but who are experiencing sadness, stress, anxiety, fear, loneliness, or major life changes such as a death of a spouse. The spirits of adults and children alike are often lifted by the presence of animals.

Often times, when medical science and human interaction fail, animals succeed in helping to treat those experiencing emotional difficulties including depression, anxiety, and extreme anger and aggressiveness. Emotional support animals can bring people out of emotionally suppressing states, help them feel less isolated and alone, and provide other health benefits such as lowering heart rate and stress. Emotional support animals have even shown to be beneficial to those with autism and/or Down’s Syndrome. (Close supervision of the animal with a child with autism, for instance, is imperative for the safety of the animal).

Since we know that mind and body are connected, as discussed my article, “Is it All in Our Thinking?“, we are aware that attitude and frame of mind have a great deal of power when overcoming physical ailments and/or disease. When an animal brings joy and peace to a person, he or she tends to gain a greater desire to recover and heal faster; and often times, to continue to live.

Emotional support animals can help a person afraid to travel or even be in public places. The mere presence of the animal helps give security and encouragement for a person to leave his or her house, got to a store, ride in a car, train or plane, or simply to engage in local social activities.

Animals often provide unconditional love that one human may never experience from another human. The need to take care of the animal also helps give people a feeling of responsibility, autonomy, and self esteem or self worth. Animals can bring a certain incredible strength to people that gives them higher quality of life and happiness in a world which can often times be a battlefield. Animals can act as armor and make one more resilient and exultant, helping them to triumph over major adversity or just to be there as a best friend, companion and lifeline.

Please visit DOCintheBiz for emotional/mental self help links and the opportunity to email me for professional and confidential help with any concerns you may have. You are never alone! Other wonderful resources out there include the Delta Society, Therapy Dogs International, and Citizens for Pets in Condos, to name just a few.

Are There Bad People?

admin — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 19:32:28 +0000

by KC Kelly, Ph.D., LMHC

http://DOCintheBiz.com

Are There Bad People? Have you ever heard a child say, “I’m a bad boy” or “I’m a bad girl”? I have always taught the children with whom I have worked and counseled that there is no such thing as a “bad” child. I go on to explain that there are no “bad” children or people, only “bad” choices and behaviors that they may make or exhibit.

I think that it is very important for people to realize this. When working with, counseling, befriending, or even romancing another person, you must find good qualities in him/her in order to form any kind of relationship. If not, they should not be in your life.

It may be spiritual or even religious (I have no idea), but my way of thinking is that everyone, no matter who they are, with what issue(s) or even disorder(s) they may suffer, or what kinds of inappropriate choices they have made in their lifetime, they have redeeming qualities that make them a good person. This goes for everyone. Even the seemingly “worst” person you think you know, has good qualities that may just never be overt to you. Maybe not even to him/her. But these good qualities are there, perhaps buried deep below the surface. Some may completely disagree with me and that’s OK too, but I care to try to seek out the good in people, and if I cannot, I prefer to not have them in my life.

Do you feel like you’re a “bad” person? Have you done things for which you cannot forgive yourself? Do you live with guilt and blame which you inflict upon yourself? If the answer is “yes” please re-read what I have written above.

You can have all the people in the world telling you that you have good qualities, that you are a good person, and that you are worthy. However, as you may already know, YOU have to be the one to believe it more than anyone else. Yes, it would be nice for others to see this good in you, but the most important one to see this good? Of course, you knew what I was going to say…YOU!

Are There Bad People? I don’t think so. Only bad choices and behaviors which people can learn how to correct.

Please visit me at http://DOCintheBiz.com for mental health self help links and the opportunity to email me for professional and confidential help with any concerns you may have. You are never alone!

Dr. KC
http://DOCintheBiz.com