by KC Kelly, Ph.D., LMHC

http://DOCintheBiz.com

Is crying a sign of weakness? I don’t believe so. In fact, crying could very well be the opposite. What does crying do for us? I know personally, that when I cry, it releases my stress level immensely. Hey, this is better than throwing, punching, or even worse, right? As women, we do not have to deal as much with the negative social stigma of crying that society has put onto men, but I hope this will fade in time. Because men release their stress levels often in more outwardly aggressive ways, if the social stigma were not pasted onto men about crying, do you think there would be more peace in our world? Maybe. Maybe not.

Is crying is a sign of weakness? I think it is more a sign of strength, courage and even wisdom as I know that my stress level will decrease after those tears are out. And finding ways to release our stress is one of the best things that we can do for ourselves and our overall mental/emotional/physical health. I rarely hear of someone saying they feel more stressed or upset after crying. Unless, they are referring to the bags under their eyes afterwards.

Shortly after deciding to write an article about crying, I found some information stating that a biochemist from the University of Minnesota had actually stated in his article entitled, “Crying: The Mystery of Tears” that, “People feel better after crying due to the elimination of hormones associated with stress”. Research has shared that due to the chemical composition of emotional tears, some scientists have hypothesized that a function of crying is to rid the body of stress hormones.

The American Academy of Pediatrics shares the many purposes that crying serves for infants. It helps them to communicate when they are uncomfortable, it gives them a way to call for help when hungry or uncomfortable, it helps to shut out sights, sounds and other sensations that are too intense and it helps release tension. So, as we have grown older, we now have the capacity to not exhibit whaling cries because we are hungry, but still cry for many of the same reasons. The grounds for our tears metamorphosize as we get older, but the underlying reasons are usually the same: We are distressed about something.

When I talk of being upset about something, I usually resort back to my example of relativity. If a two year old child gets his/her toy taken away, they will cry as if it is the worst thing on Earth. For the two year old, the stress of losing that toy is enough to bring upon major tears. When they are finished crying, they usually fall asleep or are just calm enough to sit and stare. Have you ever noticed this with a young child? The stress hormones have been released and they now show as calm and more relaxed, even if they haven’t gotten what they wanted.

Adults, although they usually don’t cry for the same reasons, have the same kind of reaction when the crying is complete. Crying is a healthy release when done in moderation. Sometimes we have to give ourselves a certain amount of time to cry over what distresses us, and then change our thought pattern to stop the crying. If crying goes on for hours and hours or days, we must look into this more closely, however, typical crying is an amazing stress reliever. So, is crying a sign of weakness? I would have to again, say, “no”.

Please visit me at http://DOCintheBiz.com for mental health self help links and the opportunity to email me for professional and confidential help with any concerns you may have. You are never alone!

Dr. KC
http://DOCintheBiz.com

Information found in: William H. Frey, Muriel Langseth (1985), Crying: The Mystery of Tears . Minneapolis. Winston Press.

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